[ it's not as flirty as it normally would've been with someone else, but there's still something there. hojoon may be holding his hand, and he may be looking at junsu in a way that makes his breath catch.
but he's being careful, too. letting hojoon know if he just wants to be with someone, around someone, that's okay too. if all he needs is quiet company, junsu can give him that. doing nothing is an option.
but if he wants something, if he wants him...
his fingers shift, tugging on hojoon's hand as he moves away from the board. he pulls hojoon so they're closer, putting distance between them and the game. ]
[joon's heart is pounding as he crosses over the board. he remembers a few games ending this way, with hojoon playfully complaining that this wasn't acceptable strategy. but it was winning strategy. it always worked.
it's working now too, but joon is letting it work. he's resisting the much wiser voices that are telling him to stop this before it goes too far. he's been shutting junsu out with every reminder of why it's a bad idea. but right now he's turning a deaf ear to them.]
That's all this really was. [hojoon murmurs, head down so that his pale bangs hide his eyes.] I wanted to spend time with you.
[it's like an echo, the past superimposing itself of the present. the present burying the past beneath it. he stops only when he's right up against junsu, fingers curling in the collar of his shirt to pull it down, to breathe in the scent of his neck. it breaks his heart a little, because junsu's scent is already becoming familiar. from now on, when he closes his eyes and breathes in, maybe haneul's won't be the one that comes to him so automatically.
but haneul had two scents, and one of them was burning, and that makes joon press his face even more against junsu's neck, inhaling him and biting, immediately pressing his lips against that spot because he shouldn't have. but it's too late now, and joon's eyes are little clouded when he does lift his head to press his mouth against the human's.]
[ junsu doesn't even ask him what he's doing. he just puts a hand on his back, lets him pull at his collar and bury his face there. his hand is still. the other curls in hojoon's shirt at his chest, keeping him right where he is. if he tries to pull away, to really move away, he'll hold him back.
it feels like that's important. holding on.
his breath hitches at the bite, the kiss, his heart hammering. hojoon isn't pushing him away. it's important, a fragile kind of moment he doesn't want to break. so he says nothing. just holds on.
and keeps doing so when their lips meet, kissing back softly, biting back a sound. as if hojoon might startle and snap out of it. junsu doesn't want him to. he likes this. likes the feel of his mouth against his own, and the taste of him when he parts his lips, just a little, letting hojoon decide if the kiss should be more. ]
[everything is fragile for a moment. joon's still waging a war against himself, angry that he couldn't be stronger, not on that night and not tonight. the taste of junsu's mouth and the warmth of his body is like sinking into quicksand, but at some point joon's struggle shifts from trying to escape it to trying to sink all the way down.]
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?
[he whispers it a bit breathlessly. what the fuck was he thinking, biting him without warning? biting him at all, for that matter. he doesn't remember ever doing that before. joon breaks away to kiss his neck once more in apology.
then he straddles the human, cupping his face and kissing him with parted lips to deepen the kiss.]
[ junsu is almost frantic when hojoon pulls away, but he doesn't actually go anywhere. just kisses his neck. junsu's heart is in his throat for some reason. ]
No, no — It's okay. I like it.
[ his hands are on hojoon's waist now, and this time when the kiss deepens he lets himself moan into it, lets himself surge into the kiss as his fingers push up fabric to find skin. he hadn't thought he'd want hojoon this much, but now that they're kissing, now that he's in his lap, now that whatever was holding him back is gone, it's intense.
he kisses hojoon a little harder. a little more demanding, but like he's giving permission. saying it's fine. it's okay. if hojoon wants to climb into his lap, kiss into his mouth, take off his clothes. all of that. it's an invitation. his hand rests at the small of his back, skin to skin. ]
[junsu's fingers seem to grip him with every movement that puts an inch of space between them. it's surprising, and different, but only because he never resisted haneul. he gave in from the beginning, and has spent the last year convinced that it was the worst decision he'd ever made.
but it makes him feel wanted. right now, junsu makes him feel wanted, even after all of that. except he doesn't know, and he should know, and that should be a good enough reason for this not happening between them.
except a kiss like his is hard to deny. joon did better than most after the one in the kitchen, and the times after that when he wanted to do it again. hojoon breathes a curse against his lips when junsu touches his skin. and suddenly there's flames around the human's fingers. new ones are ignited everywhere that junsu touches, never burning junsu, just showing him how magical his touch really is to the kitsune.]
[ he pulls away for air long enough to notice the flames at his fingertips with each touch up along hojoon's skin, finds his eyes and gets lost in them a moment, lips reddened from kissing. he gets the message. what it means. his hand keeps moving, eyes on joon, fingers at his ribs now, at his chest, over his heart.
one hand reaches for hojoon's cheek.
this is how it feels hojoon, flames igniting at his skin. his heart is in his throat but in the best way. some wall that he kept putting up has fallen away entirely, and junsu's happy and relieved and he hopes he can know him more, better, from here. he wants that.
he kisses hojoon again, tugging at his shirt, leaning away to tug it over his head and toss it aside. he drags his hand down his chest and watches the flames and then captures hojoon's lips as his arms wind around him, pulling him tight against his lap. ]
[he'd worried that he'd be thinking of someone else. that was just one of joon's many worries, and he knew that it wouldn't be fair to junsu. he didn't want to use him that way, his respect for humans too high for it. the way he felt for junsu especially too much to allow it.
but it isn't the case. hojoon looks at junsu and sees only junsu, and later he'll feel guilt for a different reason, feel like he's betrayed someone that he loved so much. it's almost like he's looking for reasons not to be happy.
yet junsu looks at him that way with flames dancing at his fingertips, and hojoon finds himself smiling, wide and foxy and against all odds. it's almost embarrassing to have someone look at him so intensely, want him so openly. joon lifts his arms up to help him with his shirt, closing his eyes to just breathe before junsu kisses him again. before he pulls him close. he makes a sound into it, opening his eyes just enough to watch his face, his expression.]
Truth or dare. [joon mumbles before turning his head a little to kiss him from a different angle, breaking every few kisses to look at him.] Tell me what you want or dare me to do it.
[ that smile takes his breath away. he thought, with how much push and pull there had been, that this might be fraught, maybe even tense. that hojoon would have to be coaxed into relaxing. into being calm. but he looks... gorgeous, and fine, and like he's happy to be doing this with him.
it's a relief. it makes junsu happy too. whatever conflict present in hojoon, he wants to soothe away. ]
You're beautiful, Joon.
[ his hands slide back down, making a grab for his ass, squeezing. he makes little sounds into every kiss, until he's giving his bottom lip a little nip. ]
[hojoon snorts softly, hands roaming over junsu through his shirt. it's not that he thinks of himself as unattractive, but if he's beautiful, what must junsu be? gorgeous? breathtaking? ethereal?
it all sounds about right.
joon rocks his hips against junsu's when he squeezes his ass. it feels good, it all feels good, and it's more obvious than ever that joon likes it. but the dare itself is a reminder of what's happening, how far this is going.
he hesitates.
and then decides that he can't deny junsu's request. he doesn't want to, he wants him to see him, it might be the most open he's been with him. hojoon keeps his eyes on him as he reaches down between them, unfastening his jeans before moving back to slide them down his hips, off his legs, unbothered by his own nudity.]
[ the hesitation is noted. junsu holds his breath. then the hesitation is gone, and he breathes out, watching, eyeing, not able to take his eyes off of him. he could wake up any second. blink, and hojoon would be gone. breathe in, and hojoon would slam the door in his face again.
but right now he's naked, and so beautiful, and junsu's eyes trail over his body. ]
I spoke too soon. You're ethereal, baby.
[ he takes off his own shirt, then crawls over to joon, putting a hand on his chest and gently guiding him back, lips meeting lips. the kiss is slow but heated. his lips trail to his chin, his neck, hand dragging down to his stomach as he kisses a path down his chest. ]
Let me take care of you? [ he says, half a request to be allowed to do so. ]
[this isn't a dream. but at some point junsu will fall asleep, and he will wake up, and hojoon will be gone as if it was.
that's then, this is now.
joon knows that he's beautiful. it's not even that he can alter his appearance. his kind are made to be beautiful, to appeal to humans and not frighten then. but junsu's compliment is still special to him, makes him want to sprawl and arch and put himself more on display for the human's gaze.
he's more relaxed when junsu kisses him now, more natural. joon's hands are touching his chest, mouth yielding to him, even if there's a soft whine of protest when junsu takes it away. he soon realizes where junsu is going when he kisses lower than his neck. joon blinks, looking down at him with that conflicted look again, wanting but with something holding him back.]
Your mouth is for speaking wishes and prayers. You don't have to do that for me. [joon catches his bottom lip between this teeth for a moment.] Unless doing it is one of your wishes. Then...
[hojoon trails off, tongue soothing his bottom lip before he nods.]
[ junsu is frozen while johoon battles with his thoughts, as he speaks. he doesn't kiss lower, waiting for permission. not wanting to push. the balance here is precarious, and he doesn't want to upset it. if joon has limits, junsu will give him space to establish them.
he practically melts when he gets a positive response, smiling and burying his nose against joon's chest, kissing down, nosing at his belly and nipping at him with his teeth before kissing the spot, as joon had done to his neck earlier. ]
It's one of my wishes.
[ he looks up at him from where he is, lips pressing a kiss to a hip bone, then the other. ]
Want to taste you. [ he starts with touch at first, hand smoothing up and down his thigh before he touches his cock, a gentle stroke as his fingers curl around it. his tongue comes next, from base to tip, eyes closing and making a soft sound. he likes doing this, and he kind of thought joon would never really want him, but it's actually happening, and he needs to do... so good.
he needs to be amazing and make joon forget all the things trapping him.
he takes him into his mouth, sinking down on him all the way. ]
[it's one of my wishes. the next few breaths that joon takes are slightly broken, shaky exhales and hitched inhales. it's okay for him to do this. hojoon shouts it back at the voices that are telling him otherwise. it's okay for him to do this, because junsu wishes it. and while he's not a wish granter, per se, he's definitely not one to turn humans aside.
maybe he would be strong enough, if it was anyone but junsu.
at some point, the go board gets nudged. the stones fall a few at a time, sounding like rain as they hit the floor. it's a nice sound, so hojoon's illusions automatically kick in to make it sound like a rain shower outside of swamp house. hojoon is only concerned about what's inside of it, inside of this room and on this bed. he makes a sound when junsu takes him into his mouth.]
Take your time. [joon whispers, his voice already a little wrecked. he remembers what junsu said at the game, about his gag reflex. but he wants both of them to enjoy this to the fullest, a little part of him already fearing, knowing that this should never happen again. he wants to memorize everything about how beautiful the human is. finally, a new good memory to treasure and give him strength.] You're incredible. You're the most wonderful thing in this world and I will burn to ash anyone who ever tells you otherwise.
[joon's words are dangerous, but his touch is gentle. he slides his fingers through his hair, petting before they curl. he leans his head back, arching a little when junsu's tongue touches a certain spot on his cock. he laughs shakily.]
And holy fuck, that mouth on you is heaven on earth.
[ they're very dangerous words, because they're making their way into junsu's chest, in his heart, and he'll remember them. it means something, this, what hojoon is saying. it makes him feel so good, and like he matters, and this time because he's human. it's the first time in a long time he touches a person like this for the first time while they know he isn't magical. hojoon knows what he is and this is what he thinks of him.
makes his heart seize up. makes him whisper, hojoon heavy and hot against his tongue, the taste of him filling his mouth.
he slows down, having been told to take his time, taking it to mean joon wants something slower and more careful. he looks at him with his lips wrapped around him, slowly moving over him before licking over the tip.
every action that causes a reaction he repeats, tongue over the same spots, hands on his hips, moaning and sinking back down all the way here and there, for a second or two. just to make hojoon feel it, to make him know he can take all of him, to look at him with his nose pressed against his skin and swallow. ]
[the difference between this, what's real and what's memory, what's illusion. it's overwhelming. joon can barely believe that it's happening, that he let it happen-
he squeezes his eyes shut at that thought. but junsu is there when he opens them again, looking at him with dark eyes and a perfectly red mouth stretched around him. it punches the oxygen out of him, blowing out the few flames that were still dancing on his skin.
that's when he starts to struggle with his control, wanting to move, not daring when he wants the control to be junsu's. the urge to squirm moves just beneath his skin, making him grip junsu's hair and the mattress respectively.]
I'm almost-
[the sentence is interrupted by a moan and a little jump in his body. joon's hand slides along the other's cheek and jaw, cupping it, thumb brushing the corner of his mouth to feel how well he takes him. hojoon takes a few more harsh breaths, but a tremble has taken over his body and it's not letting him go. something in him has to give.]
Fuck, I'm gonna - move back, Junsu-
[because coming in his mouth would be the final nail in joon's coffin.]
[ there's still something holding joon back. junsu wants to tell him it's okay, to talk him through it, to speak softly and make him feel okay about taking this, about having it. but he doesn't want to pull off of him. not only is it addicting to feel him like this, against his tongue, hard and hot in his mouth.
but he's scared if he stops hojoon will let the walls come back up.
joon's touch on his face makes him want to cry. he can feel him getting closer, his body trembling, but the touch is gentle, heated but still soft.
he doesn't move away. he said he wanted to taste him, and he meant it. he only moans, swallows around him again, brings a hand beneath to cup at him at the same time. hoping he can to draw an explosive orgasm out of joon with his touch, his tongue, his mouth, the way he closes his eyes but then looks up again to find hojoon's. his free hand pats around and finds his, linking their fingers together. it's okay, let go, i've got you. that's what he's trying to say. ]
[he can't breathe. joon's entire body is tense, and he is still fighting it, but junsu's mouth is still hot and perfect around him. it makes him weak, he's sorry...whoever he's apologizing to, he's so sorry.
he whines, and it's not a sound that's entirely human. joon grits his teeth against it, like this isn't the most pleasure he's felt in so many months.
but it is. junsu looks him in the eyes and it sets him on fire - maybe not literally, maybe not the way his powers can. this is a human's power alone, making him feel this kind of heat. he squeezes junsu's fingers, holding tightly to his hand as he comes, a sudden rush that makes him cry out and curl inward, around junsu.]
[ junsu moans around him some more when he comes, just to hear him sound like this, to feel his fingers hold onto him. he pulls off only once joon is done, licking at his lips to make sure nothing escaped, that he got everything. he's breathless, hard, but all he wants is to curl up around hojoon. this feels significant, and he may not know much, but he knows enough that getting here with joon was a bit of a challenge.
he was let in, and the aftermath of that can be as hard as getting to this point.
he noses at joon's hip, then lets go of his hand to card fingers through his hair, soothing. he can say the things he couldn't say before, with his voice a little wrecked and a little hoarse. ]
You're okay. I got you. [ he really wants to kiss him. he settles close to him, eyes falling to his lips. ]
[joon murmurs the words. junsu can never say that he doesn't have a power ever again, because he does. he's proof of it.
he stays hunched over for a few seconds more, shoulders rising and falling as he catches his breath. his bangs are damp with sweat, and they stick to his forehead when he tries to push them out of his eyes.
his hand freezes when he looks up and sees junsu from between a few strands. hojoon looks suddenly startled. he looks at junsu, looking flushed and hungry for more, the scattered go stones on the floor, his own clothing cast aside.
[ junsu flushes happily, ducking his head and biting his lip so he's not grinning too wide. it's such a compliment right now. he made it past hojoon's defenses. he really is a beast tamer, though he'd never think of him as a beast.
he laughs softly. ]
Nothing yet, except turn me on. [ he helps him brush aside sweaty bangs. ] It's okay. You don't have to do anything.
[ he cups joon's cheek, kisses the other since he's not sure a kiss on the mouth will be welcome. he could ask, but joon looks thrown, so he's giving him a bit of space to breathe. proving he means his words. if this is all joon wants, that's okay. ]
[junsu looks so happy. it breaks joon's heart, because he already knows. he knows that this shouldn't have happened. he knows that nights exactly like this dulled and distracted him before. he closes his eyes, fingers sliding along the underside of the human's arms. he's drawn to him, falls towards junsu slowly until he finds his mouth first. the kiss is slow too, but not chaste.
joon wishes. he would give anything to keep this pain one-sided. he would hurt forever in junsu's place. but he's done it now. his selfishness is going to hurt someone that his heart longs for, just like it did with haneul.]
I want to.
[he can put it off for this one night. hojoon's hands reach for the front of junsu's pants.]
I want to.
[joon repeats the words while nodding. he wants to, and that's the problem. but he can't just leave him like this, taking without giving back. without letting him use his own brand of magic a little bit more.]
[ the kiss has him sighing and groaning against hojoon's mouth, keeping the kiss slow but far from chaste himself, his hand at joon's neck. it's wonderful and hot and still he thinks if this is all, it's fine.
but it's not all. his breath hitches. to hear joon say this, with the sound of rain behind them, the taste of him, his lips still buzzing with it, it makes him want to jump into his arms. hojoon wants to touch him and make him feel good. to junsu, that means this is more than just being attracted to him and wanting some release. this is hojoon wanting to make him feel good and caring about him.
he nods. he trusts hojoon with this. ]
T-Touch me?
[ he presses his forehead against hojoon's hand fumbling to help him get his pants off, pushing at them and kicking them away. ]
[hojoon smiles at the request, a little fire burning in his eyes as he looks into junsu's. it's so simple. he really could've asked for anything, there's nothing joon would've denied him. but junsu wants to be touched, and that sounds good to hojoon too.]
Where, here?
[he trails his fingers along junsu's shoulders with a little grin, dropping his touch to the back of his elbow. he kisses junsu again before repeating the question, hands roaming over random parts of his body.
it started as a tease. but joon quickly starts to love the feeling of junsu's skin under his hands. he remembers the name of every bone in a human's body. muscles...most of the muscles, he's forgotten.]
Here?
[he whispers it again as he slides his hand against the soft skin of junsu's inner thigh, watching as it makes his legs slide open a little more for him. until his hand lifts and he's rubbing his palm against the underside of his cock. the human body really is something.]
[ in spite of being extremely turned on and very much wanting hojoon's touch now that he's expressed wanting to give junsu that, he finds himself amused. smiling, huffing breathless laughter. ]
Should've — should've known you'd be a tease.
[ it feels like a bit more than that, though, like each touch is appreciative, exploring. it doesn't make junsu feel like a weak human being touched like he's fragile. just like he's important, and he likes that. he wants to be special to people. he feels special now.
his breathing hitches when joon's palm touches him, hips lifting to meet the contact, his head dropping back. ]
Don't stop. [ he says as he wraps his arms around joon's shoulders, keeping him close. it's a bit like he's saying don't go, beneath it all. he doesn't want to feel those doors close again after this. he doesn't want that wall to return. ]
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[ it's not as flirty as it normally would've been with someone else, but there's still something there. hojoon may be holding his hand, and he may be looking at junsu in a way that makes his breath catch.
but he's being careful, too. letting hojoon know if he just wants to be with someone, around someone, that's okay too. if all he needs is quiet company, junsu can give him that. doing nothing is an option.
but if he wants something, if he wants him...
his fingers shift, tugging on hojoon's hand as he moves away from the board. he pulls hojoon so they're closer, putting distance between them and the game. ]
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it's working now too, but joon is letting it work. he's resisting the much wiser voices that are telling him to stop this before it goes too far. he's been shutting junsu out with every reminder of why it's a bad idea. but right now he's turning a deaf ear to them.]
That's all this really was. [hojoon murmurs, head down so that his pale bangs hide his eyes.] I wanted to spend time with you.
[it's like an echo, the past superimposing itself of the present. the present burying the past beneath it. he stops only when he's right up against junsu, fingers curling in the collar of his shirt to pull it down, to breathe in the scent of his neck. it breaks his heart a little, because junsu's scent is already becoming familiar. from now on, when he closes his eyes and breathes in, maybe haneul's won't be the one that comes to him so automatically.
but haneul had two scents, and one of them was burning, and that makes joon press his face even more against junsu's neck, inhaling him and biting, immediately pressing his lips against that spot because he shouldn't have. but it's too late now, and joon's eyes are little clouded when he does lift his head to press his mouth against the human's.]
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it feels like that's important. holding on.
his breath hitches at the bite, the kiss, his heart hammering. hojoon isn't pushing him away. it's important, a fragile kind of moment he doesn't want to break. so he says nothing. just holds on.
and keeps doing so when their lips meet, kissing back softly, biting back a sound. as if hojoon might startle and snap out of it. junsu doesn't want him to. he likes this. likes the feel of his mouth against his own, and the taste of him when he parts his lips, just a little, letting hojoon decide if the kiss should be more. ]
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I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?
[he whispers it a bit breathlessly. what the fuck was he thinking, biting him without warning? biting him at all, for that matter. he doesn't remember ever doing that before. joon breaks away to kiss his neck once more in apology.
then he straddles the human, cupping his face and kissing him with parted lips to deepen the kiss.]
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No, no — It's okay. I like it.
[ his hands are on hojoon's waist now, and this time when the kiss deepens he lets himself moan into it, lets himself surge into the kiss as his fingers push up fabric to find skin. he hadn't thought he'd want hojoon this much, but now that they're kissing, now that he's in his lap, now that whatever was holding him back is gone, it's intense.
he kisses hojoon a little harder. a little more demanding, but like he's giving permission. saying it's fine. it's okay. if hojoon wants to climb into his lap, kiss into his mouth, take off his clothes. all of that. it's an invitation. his hand rests at the small of his back, skin to skin. ]
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but it makes him feel wanted. right now, junsu makes him feel wanted, even after all of that. except he doesn't know, and he should know, and that should be a good enough reason for this not happening between them.
except a kiss like his is hard to deny. joon did better than most after the one in the kitchen, and the times after that when he wanted to do it again. hojoon breathes a curse against his lips when junsu touches his skin. and suddenly there's flames around the human's fingers. new ones are ignited everywhere that junsu touches, never burning junsu, just showing him how magical his touch really is to the kitsune.]
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one hand reaches for hojoon's cheek.
this is how it feels hojoon, flames igniting at his skin. his heart is in his throat but in the best way. some wall that he kept putting up has fallen away entirely, and junsu's happy and relieved and he hopes he can know him more, better, from here. he wants that.
he kisses hojoon again, tugging at his shirt, leaning away to tug it over his head and toss it aside. he drags his hand down his chest and watches the flames and then captures hojoon's lips as his arms wind around him, pulling him tight against his lap. ]
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but it isn't the case. hojoon looks at junsu and sees only junsu, and later he'll feel guilt for a different reason, feel like he's betrayed someone that he loved so much. it's almost like he's looking for reasons not to be happy.
yet junsu looks at him that way with flames dancing at his fingertips, and hojoon finds himself smiling, wide and foxy and against all odds. it's almost embarrassing to have someone look at him so intensely, want him so openly. joon lifts his arms up to help him with his shirt, closing his eyes to just breathe before junsu kisses him again. before he pulls him close. he makes a sound into it, opening his eyes just enough to watch his face, his expression.]
Truth or dare. [joon mumbles before turning his head a little to kiss him from a different angle, breaking every few kisses to look at him.] Tell me what you want or dare me to do it.
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it's a relief. it makes junsu happy too. whatever conflict present in hojoon, he wants to soothe away. ]
You're beautiful, Joon.
[ his hands slide back down, making a grab for his ass, squeezing. he makes little sounds into every kiss, until he's giving his bottom lip a little nip. ]
Dare you to take your pants off.
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[hojoon snorts softly, hands roaming over junsu through his shirt. it's not that he thinks of himself as unattractive, but if he's beautiful, what must junsu be? gorgeous? breathtaking? ethereal?
it all sounds about right.
joon rocks his hips against junsu's when he squeezes his ass. it feels good, it all feels good, and it's more obvious than ever that joon likes it. but the dare itself is a reminder of what's happening, how far this is going.
he hesitates.
and then decides that he can't deny junsu's request. he doesn't want to, he wants him to see him, it might be the most open he's been with him. hojoon keeps his eyes on him as he reaches down between them, unfastening his jeans before moving back to slide them down his hips, off his legs, unbothered by his own nudity.]
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but right now he's naked, and so beautiful, and junsu's eyes trail over his body. ]
I spoke too soon. You're ethereal, baby.
[ he takes off his own shirt, then crawls over to joon, putting a hand on his chest and gently guiding him back, lips meeting lips. the kiss is slow but heated. his lips trail to his chin, his neck, hand dragging down to his stomach as he kisses a path down his chest. ]
Let me take care of you? [ he says, half a request to be allowed to do so. ]
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that's then, this is now.
joon knows that he's beautiful. it's not even that he can alter his appearance. his kind are made to be beautiful, to appeal to humans and not frighten then. but junsu's compliment is still special to him, makes him want to sprawl and arch and put himself more on display for the human's gaze.
he's more relaxed when junsu kisses him now, more natural. joon's hands are touching his chest, mouth yielding to him, even if there's a soft whine of protest when junsu takes it away. he soon realizes where junsu is going when he kisses lower than his neck. joon blinks, looking down at him with that conflicted look again, wanting but with something holding him back.]
Your mouth is for speaking wishes and prayers. You don't have to do that for me. [joon catches his bottom lip between this teeth for a moment.] Unless doing it is one of your wishes. Then...
[hojoon trails off, tongue soothing his bottom lip before he nods.]
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he practically melts when he gets a positive response, smiling and burying his nose against joon's chest, kissing down, nosing at his belly and nipping at him with his teeth before kissing the spot, as joon had done to his neck earlier. ]
It's one of my wishes.
[ he looks up at him from where he is, lips pressing a kiss to a hip bone, then the other. ]
Want to taste you. [ he starts with touch at first, hand smoothing up and down his thigh before he touches his cock, a gentle stroke as his fingers curl around it. his tongue comes next, from base to tip, eyes closing and making a soft sound. he likes doing this, and he kind of thought joon would never really want him, but it's actually happening, and he needs to do... so good.
he needs to be amazing and make joon forget all the things trapping him.
he takes him into his mouth, sinking down on him all the way. ]
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maybe he would be strong enough, if it was anyone but junsu.
at some point, the go board gets nudged. the stones fall a few at a time, sounding like rain as they hit the floor. it's a nice sound, so hojoon's illusions automatically kick in to make it sound like a rain shower outside of swamp house. hojoon is only concerned about what's inside of it, inside of this room and on this bed. he makes a sound when junsu takes him into his mouth.]
Take your time. [joon whispers, his voice already a little wrecked. he remembers what junsu said at the game, about his gag reflex. but he wants both of them to enjoy this to the fullest, a little part of him already fearing, knowing that this should never happen again. he wants to memorize everything about how beautiful the human is. finally, a new good memory to treasure and give him strength.] You're incredible. You're the most wonderful thing in this world and I will burn to ash anyone who ever tells you otherwise.
[joon's words are dangerous, but his touch is gentle. he slides his fingers through his hair, petting before they curl. he leans his head back, arching a little when junsu's tongue touches a certain spot on his cock. he laughs shakily.]
And holy fuck, that mouth on you is heaven on earth.
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makes his heart seize up. makes him whisper, hojoon heavy and hot against his tongue, the taste of him filling his mouth.
he slows down, having been told to take his time, taking it to mean joon wants something slower and more careful. he looks at him with his lips wrapped around him, slowly moving over him before licking over the tip.
every action that causes a reaction he repeats, tongue over the same spots, hands on his hips, moaning and sinking back down all the way here and there, for a second or two. just to make hojoon feel it, to make him know he can take all of him, to look at him with his nose pressed against his skin and swallow. ]
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he squeezes his eyes shut at that thought. but junsu is there when he opens them again, looking at him with dark eyes and a perfectly red mouth stretched around him. it punches the oxygen out of him, blowing out the few flames that were still dancing on his skin.
that's when he starts to struggle with his control, wanting to move, not daring when he wants the control to be junsu's. the urge to squirm moves just beneath his skin, making him grip junsu's hair and the mattress respectively.]
I'm almost-
[the sentence is interrupted by a moan and a little jump in his body. joon's hand slides along the other's cheek and jaw, cupping it, thumb brushing the corner of his mouth to feel how well he takes him. hojoon takes a few more harsh breaths, but a tremble has taken over his body and it's not letting him go. something in him has to give.]
Fuck, I'm gonna - move back, Junsu-
[because coming in his mouth would be the final nail in joon's coffin.]
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but he's scared if he stops hojoon will let the walls come back up.
joon's touch on his face makes him want to cry. he can feel him getting closer, his body trembling, but the touch is gentle, heated but still soft.
he doesn't move away. he said he wanted to taste him, and he meant it. he only moans, swallows around him again, brings a hand beneath to cup at him at the same time. hoping he can to draw an explosive orgasm out of joon with his touch, his tongue, his mouth, the way he closes his eyes but then looks up again to find hojoon's. his free hand pats around and finds his, linking their fingers together. it's okay, let go, i've got you. that's what he's trying to say. ]
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he whines, and it's not a sound that's entirely human. joon grits his teeth against it, like this isn't the most pleasure he's felt in so many months.
but it is. junsu looks him in the eyes and it sets him on fire - maybe not literally, maybe not the way his powers can. this is a human's power alone, making him feel this kind of heat. he squeezes junsu's fingers, holding tightly to his hand as he comes, a sudden rush that makes him cry out and curl inward, around junsu.]
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he was let in, and the aftermath of that can be as hard as getting to this point.
he noses at joon's hip, then lets go of his hand to card fingers through his hair, soothing. he can say the things he couldn't say before, with his voice a little wrecked and a little hoarse. ]
You're okay. I got you. [ he really wants to kiss him. he settles close to him, eyes falling to his lips. ]
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[joon murmurs the words. junsu can never say that he doesn't have a power ever again, because he does. he's proof of it.
he stays hunched over for a few seconds more, shoulders rising and falling as he catches his breath. his bangs are damp with sweat, and they stick to his forehead when he tries to push them out of his eyes.
his hand freezes when he looks up and sees junsu from between a few strands. hojoon looks suddenly startled. he looks at junsu, looking flushed and hungry for more, the scattered go stones on the floor, his own clothing cast aside.
fuck. oh fuck.]
...What did I do to you?
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he laughs softly. ]
Nothing yet, except turn me on. [ he helps him brush aside sweaty bangs. ] It's okay. You don't have to do anything.
[ he cups joon's cheek, kisses the other since he's not sure a kiss on the mouth will be welcome. he could ask, but joon looks thrown, so he's giving him a bit of space to breathe. proving he means his words. if this is all joon wants, that's okay. ]
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joon wishes. he would give anything to keep this pain one-sided. he would hurt forever in junsu's place. but he's done it now. his selfishness is going to hurt someone that his heart longs for, just like it did with haneul.]
I want to.
[he can put it off for this one night. hojoon's hands reach for the front of junsu's pants.]
I want to.
[joon repeats the words while nodding. he wants to, and that's the problem. but he can't just leave him like this, taking without giving back. without letting him use his own brand of magic a little bit more.]
Name what you want from me. It's already yours.
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but it's not all. his breath hitches. to hear joon say this, with the sound of rain behind them, the taste of him, his lips still buzzing with it, it makes him want to jump into his arms. hojoon wants to touch him and make him feel good. to junsu, that means this is more than just being attracted to him and wanting some release. this is hojoon wanting to make him feel good and caring about him.
he nods. he trusts hojoon with this. ]
T-Touch me?
[ he presses his forehead against hojoon's hand fumbling to help him get his pants off, pushing at them and kicking them away. ]
Just touch me, baby.
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Where, here?
[he trails his fingers along junsu's shoulders with a little grin, dropping his touch to the back of his elbow. he kisses junsu again before repeating the question, hands roaming over random parts of his body.
it started as a tease. but joon quickly starts to love the feeling of junsu's skin under his hands. he remembers the name of every bone in a human's body. muscles...most of the muscles, he's forgotten.]
Here?
[he whispers it again as he slides his hand against the soft skin of junsu's inner thigh, watching as it makes his legs slide open a little more for him. until his hand lifts and he's rubbing his palm against the underside of his cock. the human body really is something.]
There's not an imperfect part to you.
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Should've — should've known you'd be a tease.
[ it feels like a bit more than that, though, like each touch is appreciative, exploring. it doesn't make junsu feel like a weak human being touched like he's fragile. just like he's important, and he likes that. he wants to be special to people. he feels special now.
his breathing hitches when joon's palm touches him, hips lifting to meet the contact, his head dropping back. ]
Don't stop. [ he says as he wraps his arms around joon's shoulders, keeping him close. it's a bit like he's saying don't go, beneath it all. he doesn't want to feel those doors close again after this. he doesn't want that wall to return. ]
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