[just a few moves, but he laughs at junsu's easy acceptance of defeat. but the suggestion that he won something anyway, that joon is a prize to him....
fuck. knowing that he deserves the pain won't make it hurt any less.
he puts it out of his mind, shaking his head while his hand rubs long junsu's thigh, desperate for more touches and kisses and orgasms too..]
It needs to always be at least twice. Just to make sure that first one wasn't a fluke or something.
[ junsu doesn't want to bring up that joon had looked out of it at times when he taught him, that it was this that made junsu direct them to doing something else.
he likes this moment too much. he even plays a long, going ahhh and looking illuminated. ]
I see, that makes sense. Totally logical stuff.
[ he scoots closer, humming happily at joon's touches. he feels completely spoiled with attention, with care. it's a nice feeling. ]
[he deserves this, the care, the attention. junsu's beautiful when he smiles, and he deserves all the reasons in the world to do it. hojoon is apparently one of those reasons, if tonight is true.
to be thinking of denying him those things, of actually taking those smiles away...it makes joon want to burn himself to ash for the second time in his life. and there's a limit to what he can take, and mention of round two has him stuck for a moment. he knows what junsu likes, but right now, with the thoughts that are spiraling around inside his head, it feels more like taking than giving something to him.]
I think fucking me might be a good test. [because that's different. because that's joon offering himself, knowing and wanting to do it anyway. he looks over at junsu, playing with his hair and looking at his face for his reaction.] If you're into that. It's been awhile for me, over a year. It'd be nice to feel someone again.
[ junsu smiles, closing his eyes a moment as joon plays with his hair. when he opens his eyes, there's a bit of a spark there. he likes that idea. he'd like it no matter what, he but he likes that joon asked, that it's been a while but he wants junsu. he wants to do what joon would like the most. ]
I'm into that.
[ he shifts, rolling toward joon, half on top of him and holding himself up on a forearm over him. his head dips, lips finding joon's, noses brushing. ]
[he does, even without fucking him. without touching him. junsu makes him feel amazing, and sometimes it hurts too. maybe that's all a part of healing, joon wouldn't know. he hasn't tried.
hojoon closes his eyes, lets junsu kisses him as much as he wants. but the noses thing brings a smile to his lips.]
Are you turning into a fox now? Let me see how many tails you have.
[joon reaches a hand around, grabbing junsu's ass playfully.]
[ junsu lets out a pleased little yelp, laughing as he kisses joon again, nipping at his bottom lip for that comment and ass grab. ]
You don't need an excuse to grab my ass, you know.
[ this time when he kisses joon it's more heated, almost languid but it deepens quickly, tasting him. he grinds down against him, rolls his hips with joon's hands still on his ass. ]
I didn't grab, I was inspecting! Grab is what perverts do.
[it sounds weak, even to him. joon might be laughing at himself a little when junsu starts to kiss him again. he can't remember the last time he really laughed. he can't be bothered to think too much about it with junsu's lips against his, opening him up. joon moans softly into the kiss, keeping his hands right where they are and pressing junsu's body down against his.]
[ he mumbles between kisses, but it's quickly drowned out by a moan when his body is pressed down against him. he likes that. he wonders what it would be like for joon to pin him down and fuck into him. god, he wants that too, but right now he figures they can do that next time.
another roll of his hips, and junsu's thinking of the lube and condoms in the night table, of how to best get joon's body relaxed and soft and pliant and ready. ]
[another roll of his hips and all joon is thinking about is feeling another roll of his hips. it feels good but a little strange being the one taken care of. junsu's question only adds to that feeling.
joon enjoys putting his mouth everywhere. he likes to taste and breathe a lover in. he likes using his words and other parts of his body to make them come apart as much as he likes using his cock to do it.
but it feels like he's asking junsu to do something dirty, like when he came in his mouth earlier. it feels like something that junsu's mouth shouldn't do, even when his cock gets harder at the offer. a part of him can't believe that junsu would want to do that to him, for him. but he knows that kind of thinking is nonsense too.
his lips part to answer, but it takes him a second to get the words out.]
Is it something you like doing? You don't have to do anything just for me, you already make me happy.
[ junsu's smile is so soft. they haven't known each other long, but he makes hojoon happy. he latches onto that, kissing him again through the curve of his lips. ]
I want to. [ he whispers against his mouth, echoing joon's earlier words. ] I want to make you feel so good.
[ hojoon seems to be hesitating. junsu strokes his sides with his hands, rocks against him only a little, to say i'm here, i like you, i'm into this, more than to distract or give pleasure. ]
[it works, while also still being a little distracting and giving pleasure. joon slides his hands to junsu's hips, smiling at how even this would be enough to make him happy, to just lie pressed together with junsu touching him this way. it isn't just about sex, which makes it so much more complicated.]
Okay. Yes, I'd be honored. [joon's face scrunches up, who the fuck says that.] I mean, I want to. I want you to.
[and then that grimace is back. he really hates revealing that he doesn't actually know everything about everything. something that his brother suffers with frequently.]
[ he laughs softly, so amused by i'd be honored, but pleased too. to think it's an honor to get eaten out by junsu. he doesn't feel like a measly little human around joon.
for this, junsu won't tease. joon grimaces but junsu only smiles and kisses him again to soothe him. he doesn't want to laugh at him for something he's not super knowledgeable about. he's touched, even, that he's being shown this. ]
Yeah, roll over. Get a pillow beneath your hips if you don't want to be on your knees.
[ whatever's more comfortable for joon. his hands strokes his back as he settles. ]
[it might've been more appropriate to say two hundred years ago. it hasn't been that long for him, he swears.
joon rolls over, and finds that this might actually be better. his face feels too warm right now. but he trusts junsu, and he's excited in spite of himself, so he pushes a pillow under his hips and sighs, getting settled on his stomach.]
Ready.
[he lets junsu's hands pass over him a couple more times before he says it.]
[ he doesn't let joon finish that, spreading him once his hands slide down from his back to his ass and lowering his head to press a kiss over his rim. he doesn't need to say he won't get tired, he can show it.
he starts slow at first, kisses and laps of his tongue to get him used to it. he's not assuming he never experienced this before, but his words of it being a while, and everything joon did until this point, tell him to take it easy. not to overwhelm him. to take good care of him.
once he's wet and relaxed and giving beneath his tongue, he presses it inside, lapping up at him and running a soothing hand up and down the back of his thigh. ]
[joon wouldn't think of himself as someone who's easy to overwhelm. but the very first contact has him making a surprised sound that he smothers against another pillow. he must've lifted his hips too, something he only realizes once he has to settle them back down again. he's not normally loud in bed, mostly heavy breaths and a rough voice when he does say something. when he says junsu's name, it already sounds a little wrecked.]
There's nothing your mouth can't do.
[he moans, a quiet but guttural sound. he's gripping the pillow and trying to not rock his hips back for more. each lap and press of junsu's tongue just makes him greedy for more.]
Fuck, I think I could come again, fuck-
[he's so hard, and the pillow gives him just enough friction, but this was not in the plans.]
[ junsu moans, right against him, tongue inside him, he presses a thumb along his rim too, opening him up so he can go deeper, further. he doesn't want joon to come from just this though. he wants to give him what he wants.
he pulls away, pressing a kiss at the curve of his backside. ]
Shh, not yet. Hold on a little longer.
[ his hand smoothes the small of his back as he reaches for lube, leaving as he prepares his fingers, returning as a stabilizing, soothing presence.
joon's body is more relaxed, acclimating alright to something inside. but he still takes his time, lubed fingers rubbing over his hole as he presses kisses along his skin, along the cover toward his back. he's slow when he pushes a finger inside, gives joon time before moving, stretching, adding another. he wishes he could make this last, could make this part feel as good and hot as every other touch, but he's more focused on making sure he won't hurt him. ]
You're doing amazing, Joonah. [ he says, pressing a kiss to his shoulder, adding a third finger. ]
[joon whimpers but complies, lifting his hips up just a little so he's not as tempted to rut against the bedding. it's slightly counter-productive, because it just offers him even more to junsu's mouth.
he can do it though. he's strong enough to resist the urges of his body. whether he's strong enough to resist the urges of his heart is another matter entirely.
junsu doesn't need to worry about making this part feel good, because it does. the stretch reminds him that this is really happening, and he didn't expect that it would ever again, at least not with someone that he cared about. joon presses his forehead against the pillow, on the verge of being overtaken by memories and sadness of the the past. but then he feels junsu's lips pressing against his skin. joon knows that it's him instantly, and it brings him back, it gives him a happiness that he didn't expect and definitely doesn't deserve.]
[ his kisses are trailing all over his shoulders, the back of his neck. he can't stop covering his skin with kisses, going all the way to his ear, behind it and at the curve of it.
his arm kind of hurts from the angle, but he doesn't stop until joon feels relaxed and pliable. he thinks he might be ready, but he wants to ask, wants joon to say as much instead of assuming. his fingers move again, this time more with the goal to pleasure, to send sparks up joon's spine. he curls them and spreads them and listens for every shift in joon's breathing. ]
[joon has to bite back the word now, afraid of it coming out sounding too harsh, too demanding. but he's not sure how much time has passed, time that junsu spent taking care of him, and not in some perfunctory way. joon could feel his affection in those actions, and in every press of his lips.
there's a few quiet 'ah's as junsu curls and twists his fingers, the pleasure reminding him that it wouldn't be difficult for him to come a second time if he just let go. but he holds on, wiggling his ass that's somehow both playful and shy before looking back over his shoulder.]
[ junsu quirks an eyebrow at him. as if doing this wasn't a turn on. joon's quiet sounds, the feel of him, the softness and trust they're sharing. junsu's extremely ready. ]
Oh, I'm ready.
[ he presses a kiss to his back, a last one before reaching for a condom and the lube again. ]
How do you want to do this? [ he's leaving that up to hojoon, since it's been a while for him and junsu doesn't want to assume what he'd like best, or what would be easier or more comfortable for him. ]
[joon wishes that his breath wasn't already so heavy, wishes that his heart wasn't pounding the way that it is. but it is, and he doesn't expect it to get any better, now of all times.
he presses his face against the pillow while he thinks. there's too many options: like this, on his hands and knees, on his back. he knows that junsu would feel amazing in any of them, but none of them feel quite right.
he makes a little sound when he moves again, pushing himself to sit up before turning towards the human. he slides over junsu's lap, knees on either side of his hips, arms draped over his shoulders.
he glances away for a moment, mouth an uncertain line that softens when he looks into junsu's eyes.]
[ by the time joon slides into his lap, junsu's finished getting ready. his arms go around his middle, holding him there, body feeling overheated and warmer still now that joon is so much closer. ]
Okay. [ he breathes, then smiles, eyes crinkling. he leans in to nose at him. ] Hi.
[ the nosing turns into a kiss, deep and slow, exploring joon's mouth as he gets him to lift himself up just enough that he can line up his cock with his entrance, staying still as his hands then go to his hips. he's so full of anticipation he's almost nervous. there's a tremble in his body as his heart races. he smooths over joon's sides, breaks the kiss to mumble against his lips. ]
[it feels a little surreal to be back in someone's arms when joon never imagined that he would be. like this, with nothing between them and sharing a breath. on the verge of sharing more. joon's not nervous, but he is thankful for junsu's every easy smile. every touch that's careful and unhurried.]
Hi.
[hojoon snorts a soft laugh at junsu's greeting, but there's such affection in the sound, his arms tightening around the other's shoulders as they draw closer. yeah, it's perfect like this. joon didn't expect it, but he's so glad it's with junsu.]
Okay. [he murmurs, but then he returns to the kiss for a few more seconds, not done with how sweet the human's mouth tastes to him. but they're both ready, and he knows junsu is waiting, and he took such good care of him-
he sinks down over him slowly, eyes closing, mouth opening against junsu's even though no sound comes out.]
[ junsu, on the other hand, is not very good at keeping quiet. soft noises, almost whimpers, pass his lips as joon sinks down over him. his hands are light at his hips, not gripping, just touching, guiding, a reminder he's there, a reminder to keep steady and easy.
he curses under his breath when joon settles down in his lap, arms circling his middle. one hand moves down to the curve of joon's ass, but he doesn't squeeze or play with it yet, not wanting to jostle him as they both get used to the feeling. it's not been a long time since junsu's done this at all, but it's the first time with joon.
so it's... something. his forehead presses at joon's, then he's pressing kisses at his face, the corner of his lips, his cheek and chin. he leaves him space to breathe, licks at his bottom lip, rubs a hand up and down his spine. ]
[hojoon sighs, lips puckering lightly against junsu's. he hears his voice, rolls his forehead against his, but it takes a few seconds for his body to adjust. and almost as much time for his heart to do the same.]
I'm fine.
[joon opens his eyes, blinking softly at him, almost confused by the question. or maybe he just wants to be. because he becomes aware of more than just the concern in junsu's voice, but also the press of his lips, the gentle glide of his hand, all the little things that show his care. all the reminders of things that he's not going to be able to forget tomorrow, or ever.]
I was just listening to you. [joon lifts up halfway, sheathing him again to coax more of those whimpers from the human's lips. it's...strangely adorable to him, making hojoon smile. he starts up a slow rhythm, curling his fingers against the fine hairs at the base of junsu's neck. the other hand slides down his chest as he starts to rock.] Shit, more than fine, I'm amazing. [he gasps quietly.] You're hotter than foxfire.
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[just a few moves, but he laughs at junsu's easy acceptance of defeat. but the suggestion that he won something anyway, that joon is a prize to him....
fuck. knowing that he deserves the pain won't make it hurt any less.
he puts it out of his mind, shaking his head while his hand rubs long junsu's thigh, desperate for more touches and kisses and orgasms too..]
It needs to always be at least twice. Just to make sure that first one wasn't a fluke or something.
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he likes this moment too much. he even plays a long, going ahhh and looking illuminated. ]
I see, that makes sense. Totally logical stuff.
[ he scoots closer, humming happily at joon's touches. he feels completely spoiled with attention, with care. it's a nice feeling. ]
How would you go about this round two, then?
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to be thinking of denying him those things, of actually taking those smiles away...it makes joon want to burn himself to ash for the second time in his life. and there's a limit to what he can take, and mention of round two has him stuck for a moment. he knows what junsu likes, but right now, with the thoughts that are spiraling around inside his head, it feels more like taking than giving something to him.]
I think fucking me might be a good test. [because that's different. because that's joon offering himself, knowing and wanting to do it anyway. he looks over at junsu, playing with his hair and looking at his face for his reaction.] If you're into that. It's been awhile for me, over a year. It'd be nice to feel someone again.
[in more ways than one, really.]
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I'm into that.
[ he shifts, rolling toward joon, half on top of him and holding himself up on a forearm over him. his head dips, lips finding joon's, noses brushing. ]
I want to make you feel really amazing.
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[he does, even without fucking him. without touching him. junsu makes him feel amazing, and sometimes it hurts too. maybe that's all a part of healing, joon wouldn't know. he hasn't tried.
hojoon closes his eyes, lets junsu kisses him as much as he wants. but the noses thing brings a smile to his lips.]
Are you turning into a fox now? Let me see how many tails you have.
[joon reaches a hand around, grabbing junsu's ass playfully.]
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You don't need an excuse to grab my ass, you know.
[ this time when he kisses joon it's more heated, almost languid but it deepens quickly, tasting him. he grinds down against him, rolls his hips with joon's hands still on his ass. ]
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[it sounds weak, even to him. joon might be laughing at himself a little when junsu starts to kiss him again. he can't remember the last time he really laughed. he can't be bothered to think too much about it with junsu's lips against his, opening him up. joon moans softly into the kiss, keeping his hands right where they are and pressing junsu's body down against his.]
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[ he mumbles between kisses, but it's quickly drowned out by a moan when his body is pressed down against him. he likes that. he wonders what it would be like for joon to pin him down and fuck into him. god, he wants that too, but right now he figures they can do that next time.
another roll of his hips, and junsu's thinking of the lube and condoms in the night table, of how to best get joon's body relaxed and soft and pliant and ready. ]
Do you... do you like being eaten out?
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joon enjoys putting his mouth everywhere. he likes to taste and breathe a lover in. he likes using his words and other parts of his body to make them come apart as much as he likes using his cock to do it.
but it feels like he's asking junsu to do something dirty, like when he came in his mouth earlier. it feels like something that junsu's mouth shouldn't do, even when his cock gets harder at the offer. a part of him can't believe that junsu would want to do that to him, for him. but he knows that kind of thinking is nonsense too.
his lips part to answer, but it takes him a second to get the words out.]
Is it something you like doing? You don't have to do anything just for me, you already make me happy.
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I want to. [ he whispers against his mouth, echoing joon's earlier words. ] I want to make you feel so good.
[ hojoon seems to be hesitating. junsu strokes his sides with his hands, rocks against him only a little, to say i'm here, i like you, i'm into this, more than to distract or give pleasure. ]
Only if you want to.
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Okay. Yes, I'd be honored. [joon's face scrunches up, who the fuck says that.] I mean, I want to. I want you to.
[and then that grimace is back. he really hates revealing that he doesn't actually know everything about everything. something that his brother suffers with frequently.]
Should I...roll over?
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for this, junsu won't tease. joon grimaces but junsu only smiles and kisses him again to soothe him. he doesn't want to laugh at him for something he's not super knowledgeable about. he's touched, even, that he's being shown this. ]
Yeah, roll over. Get a pillow beneath your hips if you don't want to be on your knees.
[ whatever's more comfortable for joon. his hands strokes his back as he settles. ]
Let me know when you're ready, babe.
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joon rolls over, and finds that this might actually be better. his face feels too warm right now. but he trusts junsu, and he's excited in spite of himself, so he pushes a pillow under his hips and sighs, getting settled on his stomach.]
Ready.
[he lets junsu's hands pass over him a couple more times before he says it.]
If you get tired or just want to stop-
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he starts slow at first, kisses and laps of his tongue to get him used to it. he's not assuming he never experienced this before, but his words of it being a while, and everything joon did until this point, tell him to take it easy. not to overwhelm him. to take good care of him.
once he's wet and relaxed and giving beneath his tongue, he presses it inside, lapping up at him and running a soothing hand up and down the back of his thigh. ]
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There's nothing your mouth can't do.
[he moans, a quiet but guttural sound. he's gripping the pillow and trying to not rock his hips back for more. each lap and press of junsu's tongue just makes him greedy for more.]
Fuck, I think I could come again, fuck-
[he's so hard, and the pillow gives him just enough friction, but this was not in the plans.]
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he pulls away, pressing a kiss at the curve of his backside. ]
Shh, not yet. Hold on a little longer.
[ his hand smoothes the small of his back as he reaches for lube, leaving as he prepares his fingers, returning as a stabilizing, soothing presence.
joon's body is more relaxed, acclimating alright to something inside. but he still takes his time, lubed fingers rubbing over his hole as he presses kisses along his skin, along the cover toward his back. he's slow when he pushes a finger inside, gives joon time before moving, stretching, adding another. he wishes he could make this last, could make this part feel as good and hot as every other touch, but he's more focused on making sure he won't hurt him. ]
You're doing amazing, Joonah. [ he says, pressing a kiss to his shoulder, adding a third finger. ]
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he can do it though. he's strong enough to resist the urges of his body. whether he's strong enough to resist the urges of his heart is another matter entirely.
junsu doesn't need to worry about making this part feel good, because it does. the stretch reminds him that this is really happening, and he didn't expect that it would ever again, at least not with someone that he cared about. joon presses his forehead against the pillow, on the verge of being overtaken by memories and sadness of the the past. but then he feels junsu's lips pressing against his skin. joon knows that it's him instantly, and it brings him back, it gives him a happiness that he didn't expect and definitely doesn't deserve.]
Mmm, I like being good for you.
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[ his kisses are trailing all over his shoulders, the back of his neck. he can't stop covering his skin with kisses, going all the way to his ear, behind it and at the curve of it.
his arm kind of hurts from the angle, but he doesn't stop until joon feels relaxed and pliable. he thinks he might be ready, but he wants to ask, wants joon to say as much instead of assuming. his fingers move again, this time more with the goal to pleasure, to send sparks up joon's spine. he curls them and spreads them and listens for every shift in joon's breathing. ]
Tell me when.
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there's a few quiet 'ah's as junsu curls and twists his fingers, the pleasure reminding him that it wouldn't be difficult for him to come a second time if he just let go. but he holds on, wiggling his ass that's somehow both playful and shy before looking back over his shoulder.]
I'm ready if you are.
[gaze pointedly dropping between junsu's legs.]
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Oh, I'm ready.
[ he presses a kiss to his back, a last one before reaching for a condom and the lube again. ]
How do you want to do this? [ he's leaving that up to hojoon, since it's been a while for him and junsu doesn't want to assume what he'd like best, or what would be easier or more comfortable for him. ]
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he presses his face against the pillow while he thinks. there's too many options: like this, on his hands and knees, on his back. he knows that junsu would feel amazing in any of them, but none of them feel quite right.
he makes a little sound when he moves again, pushing himself to sit up before turning towards the human. he slides over junsu's lap, knees on either side of his hips, arms draped over his shoulders.
he glances away for a moment, mouth an uncertain line that softens when he looks into junsu's eyes.]
Like this.
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Okay. [ he breathes, then smiles, eyes crinkling. he leans in to nose at him. ] Hi.
[ the nosing turns into a kiss, deep and slow, exploring joon's mouth as he gets him to lift himself up just enough that he can line up his cock with his entrance, staying still as his hands then go to his hips. he's so full of anticipation he's almost nervous. there's a tremble in his body as his heart races. he smooths over joon's sides, breaks the kiss to mumble against his lips. ]
Slowly, okay?
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Hi.
[hojoon snorts a soft laugh at junsu's greeting, but there's such affection in the sound, his arms tightening around the other's shoulders as they draw closer. yeah, it's perfect like this. joon didn't expect it, but he's so glad it's with junsu.]
Okay. [he murmurs, but then he returns to the kiss for a few more seconds, not done with how sweet the human's mouth tastes to him. but they're both ready, and he knows junsu is waiting, and he took such good care of him-
he sinks down over him slowly, eyes closing, mouth opening against junsu's even though no sound comes out.]
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he curses under his breath when joon settles down in his lap, arms circling his middle. one hand moves down to the curve of joon's ass, but he doesn't squeeze or play with it yet, not wanting to jostle him as they both get used to the feeling. it's not been a long time since junsu's done this at all, but it's the first time with joon.
so it's... something. his forehead presses at joon's, then he's pressing kisses at his face, the corner of his lips, his cheek and chin. he leaves him space to breathe, licks at his bottom lip, rubs a hand up and down his spine. ]
How are you doing?
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I'm fine.
[joon opens his eyes, blinking softly at him, almost confused by the question. or maybe he just wants to be. because he becomes aware of more than just the concern in junsu's voice, but also the press of his lips, the gentle glide of his hand, all the little things that show his care. all the reminders of things that he's not going to be able to forget tomorrow, or ever.]
I was just listening to you. [joon lifts up halfway, sheathing him again to coax more of those whimpers from the human's lips. it's...strangely adorable to him, making hojoon smile. he starts up a slow rhythm, curling his fingers against the fine hairs at the base of junsu's neck. the other hand slides down his chest as he starts to rock.] Shit, more than fine, I'm amazing. [he gasps quietly.] You're hotter than foxfire.
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