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[braced]

Comments

[braced]

it is. i dont think anyone would tell you thats easy

[chamsae]

I see. I struggle with it also, though it never occurred to me that I would before I came here. I didn't make my own choices, so there was never a question of them being right or wrong. Who would expect me to accept the blame for something that I'd not chosen to do, as long as I did it well?

That's the fearful thing about freedom. I said it was stabilizing, but it's destabilizing as well.

[braced]

your perspective is different, but most people struggle with that. i think its normal

[chamsae]

Normal. I see. Does it sound strange if I say that "normal" isn't something I'm that familiar with?

[braced]

in this case, it just means everyone feels that way and its not just you

[chamsae]

That means I'm not alone?

[braced]

yes. thats exactly what it means

[chamsae]

I think I like that feeling. It's nice not to be the only one who might have questions.

[braced]

youre definitely not

i always have questions. doubts. fears

[chamsae]

Where do you direct them? Those questions and doubts. Fears as well.

[braced]

im not the best example for this.

[chamsae]

Why do you say that?

[braced]

i dont really direct them anywhere

[chamsae]

Is that possible? Those things, where do they live, for you?

[braced]

its kind of hard to explain. i do things that... help me, i suppose, not feel them as much.

[chamsae]

That is a little difficult to understand. I'm sorry, I don't mean to be obtuse. How can you feel things less?

[braced]

it's like... i do what i can to protect myself, so some of the fear goes away.

[chamsae]

I see. Fear is harmful, so you armor yourself against it? Is safety the opposite of fear?

[braced]

something like that. i think so, anyway

[chamsae]

I hope you are always safe and never fearful.

[braced]

youre really sweet, birdie

[chamsae]

Thank you. I think I understand the usage of that word there.

So, thank you.

[braced]

hit me up when you want to go?

[chamsae]

I will do that. Hit you up.

[braced]

thats probably a funny expression, isnt it