[ the first feeling that zips through him is jealousy. it immediately makes him feel bad about himself, but he shoves that away, because — well, this is great news! this is something myung surely never thought he could have, and dal is such a good, wonderful person, and — ]
You are?! [ his expression turns into a big grin. ] Myung!
[ he says that much louder than he needs to, and basically tosses the cupcake aside to dive for myung, arms wrapping around his neck. ]
[ It's true, too, that Myung never though he'd ever get this. That he'd never get married, and yet, here he is.
And for the second time today, he finds himself with his arms full of best friend, and he laughs, hugging Junsu back, tucking himself close as he lets his heart feel close to exploding. ]
I can barely believe it myself. I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was gonna propose, it's just - I wanted to surprise you. Because I want to ask you something.
[ junsu pulls back, shaking his head. it's okay, of course, that myung waited to ask before bringing it up. he doesn't know others did know before, but even if he did he wouldn't want this to ruin the moment, and myung's announcement.
he wants to be better than that voice in his head that makes everything about him.
he squeezes myung's hands in his own, still grinning. ]
Well, I'm surprised! That's really good news... And I can help with anything you need!
I didn't think I would ever, you know? A year ago, I'd have laughed at the idea. But it feels right.
[ It feels so right.
Grinning, cheeks red, Myung looks into Junsu's eyes, trying to be serious. ]
Would you be my best man? Well. One of. You and Ten. I want you by my side. I mean, you don't have to decide right now, I don't think we're getting married any time soon, but. I wanted to ask you right away anyway.
[ that's the best indication this is a good thing, then. if myung feels right about it, then it must be, because it's the kind of thing he would have fought himself not to have, back in the day.
the request takes junsu completely by surprise, even if in hindsight he's not sure why he's so shocked. ]
Really? You want me...? [ and ten, which makes sense, but him... okay, so they're best friends. but that's all you need, to stand next to someone as they embark on a new adventure with someone special to them, no? junsu's touched to have been thought of, and touched to imagine being right next to myung as this all happens, touched enough that his eyes burn with tears. ]
Yes. Of course I'll be your best man. [ he laughs, wet and tearful. ] I'm so happy you thought to ask!
[ Myung can't help the way he laughs - he sort of expected Junsu to be surprised, even if he's not sure why. He does smile brighter when Junsu agrees though, and he possibly feel a little bit teary himself as he launches himself at Junsu, resuming the hug and burying his face in his best friend's neck. ]
Of course, you and Ten are - so important to me. I want everyone to be involved because I love you all, but you two I want by my side.
[ He pulls back a little, rolling his head on Junsu's shoulder. ]
[ junsu laughs as he catches myung into his arms, holding him close and nuzzling at his hair. it's so natural to be affectionate with him. their lives have evolved a lot since they met, and their relationship as well, but that part hasn't changed.
he scoffs, poking junsu in the ribs. he appreciates the compliment, but he knows the truth! ]
Like your mind's going to be on anything but Dal that day.
[ They've grown comfortable with each other, knowing what each other need to be feeling safe and happy and at home. It's easy for Myung to feel just right with Junsu.
With a laugh, Myung squirms. ]
My mind, sure, but what about my eyes? Look, I can recognize beauty where I see it! That's all I'm saying.
[ Myung laughs, even - right now, giddy and ecstatic, he giggles, really, falling back on Junsu's bed and staring at the ceiling for a moment as he calms down, his thoughts settling a little. ]
You don't have to worry. I want everything to be so good for him. For both of us, but him especially. And that's true for the wedding day but also like. Every day before and after that too. Fuck, Jun, when did I turn this cheesy?
Actually I think I've always been pretty cheesy, but I liked to pretend I was edgy before.
[ It was easier, back then.
But now. He's in big love. And ain't that the truth, too, as simple as that. He loves Dal in ways he's never loved anyone before - which doesn't diminish any kind of feeling he's had in the past, either. It's like everything he's ever felt for anyone else, or still feels, just compounds to make his feelings for Dal stronger, bigger, more all-encompassing. ]
What about you? You good, these days? In big love, too?
[ big enough he's stopped looking for other people to sleep with, big enough he's itching to go talk to his boyfriends about their promises of a forever future together. maybe it's just jealousy, that myung is getting there before him. but it doesn't make it less true that he made those promises without any fear or reservations. he wants that with them.
he's a bit scared, too, but he talked to hojoon and things should be getting better. ]
It's nice, isn't it? Even if it's not always easy.
[ With a smile, Myung runs a hand through his disheveled hair, the other on his stomach as he lies next to Junsu, completely comfortable, happy. Right. ]
It's very nice. It feels a little surreal, honestly. Not that long ago I thought I'd never get married, and now I'm proposing. I've proposed.
[ Actually, that makes him think - he turns to look at the side of Junsu's face. ]
What about you? You're thinking of getting it married? Would you do it with both of them at the same time?
I don't know. I guess if they wanted that, I would, but... [ when he thinks about it, he's never considered doing it with both of them at the same time. not for any wrong reasons, not because he's concerned that joon and kwang would cause problems. ]
It's so different, you know? What I have with each of them. I'd want to celebrate it differently. Not... more one than the other, just different.
[ he hopes that makes sense. he hopes that's not a bad, selfish thing to want. ]
And I don't know if we'll be at the same place at the same time, you know? Maybe we'll want to get married later, maybe Joon will want to wait, or Kwang...
[ he shrugs, because those are possibilities, and not upsetting ones. ]
But if they want it at the same time, if that works for them, I'd be happy with that too.
Makes sense to me, that you'd want to celebrate it differently.
[ After all, Hojoon and Kwang are very, very different people. It's not surprising that they'd want different things, even if they love the same person. ]
[ junsu runs his hand through his hair, bitting his lip. he'd never given it this much thought before, and he feels a bit... well, since it's such a new thought... ]
I mean, I want to be with them for the rest of my life, so. That's what it is, isn't it? Promising that?
You can promise that without getting married, though. But yeah, that's - that's what I want to do. And I also want it to be like. For him to know that whatever happens, wherever we go, whatever we end up doing, I'll be with him. That I'm not leaving him, ever again. That even if I go anywhere, I'll be coming back.
[ It's just as much this kind of promise than it is promising to love and cherish him forever. ]
I want to give him all the things he's never had. A real life.
[ He looks at Junsu again, smiling. ]
But hey, you'd get to have two weddings, that's pretty neat.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
You are?! [ his expression turns into a big grin. ] Myung!
[ he says that much louder than he needs to, and basically tosses the cupcake aside to dive for myung, arms wrapping around his neck. ]
Congratulations! I'm so happy for you!
no subject
And for the second time today, he finds himself with his arms full of best friend, and he laughs, hugging Junsu back, tucking himself close as he lets his heart feel close to exploding. ]
I can barely believe it myself. I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was gonna propose, it's just - I wanted to surprise you. Because I want to ask you something.
no subject
he wants to be better than that voice in his head that makes everything about him.
he squeezes myung's hands in his own, still grinning. ]
Well, I'm surprised! That's really good news... And I can help with anything you need!
no subject
[ It feels so right.
Grinning, cheeks red, Myung looks into Junsu's eyes, trying to be serious. ]
Would you be my best man? Well. One of. You and Ten. I want you by my side. I mean, you don't have to decide right now, I don't think we're getting married any time soon, but. I wanted to ask you right away anyway.
no subject
the request takes junsu completely by surprise, even if in hindsight he's not sure why he's so shocked. ]
Really? You want me...? [ and ten, which makes sense, but him... okay, so they're best friends. but that's all you need, to stand next to someone as they embark on a new adventure with someone special to them, no? junsu's touched to have been thought of, and touched to imagine being right next to myung as this all happens, touched enough that his eyes burn with tears. ]
Yes. Of course I'll be your best man. [ he laughs, wet and tearful. ] I'm so happy you thought to ask!
no subject
Of course, you and Ten are - so important to me. I want everyone to be involved because I love you all, but you two I want by my side.
[ He pulls back a little, rolling his head on Junsu's shoulder. ]
Plus, you'll look amazing in a suit.
no subject
he scoffs, poking junsu in the ribs. he appreciates the compliment, but he knows the truth! ]
Like your mind's going to be on anything but Dal that day.
no subject
With a laugh, Myung squirms. ]
My mind, sure, but what about my eyes? Look, I can recognize beauty where I see it! That's all I'm saying.
no subject
[ he's mock offended!!! ]
If this day isn't perfect for him I will scold you. And it goes both ways! I'll scold him for it too.
no subject
You don't have to worry. I want everything to be so good for him. For both of us, but him especially. And that's true for the wedding day but also like. Every day before and after that too. Fuck, Jun, when did I turn this cheesy?
no subject
When you fell in love, doofus. You're in big love.
[ junsu flops onto the bed next to him, smiling up at the ceiling. ]
Just be happy about it. This is how you feel and you get to live it out with Dal. That's special.
no subject
[ It was easier, back then.
But now. He's in big love. And ain't that the truth, too, as simple as that. He loves Dal in ways he's never loved anyone before - which doesn't diminish any kind of feeling he's had in the past, either. It's like everything he's ever felt for anyone else, or still feels, just compounds to make his feelings for Dal stronger, bigger, more all-encompassing. ]
What about you? You good, these days? In big love, too?
no subject
[ big enough he's stopped looking for other people to sleep with, big enough he's itching to go talk to his boyfriends about their promises of a forever future together. maybe it's just jealousy, that myung is getting there before him. but it doesn't make it less true that he made those promises without any fear or reservations. he wants that with them.
he's a bit scared, too, but he talked to hojoon and things should be getting better. ]
It's nice, isn't it? Even if it's not always easy.
no subject
It's very nice. It feels a little surreal, honestly. Not that long ago I thought I'd never get married, and now I'm proposing. I've proposed.
[ Actually, that makes him think - he turns to look at the side of Junsu's face. ]
What about you? You're thinking of getting it married? Would you do it with both of them at the same time?
no subject
It's so different, you know? What I have with each of them. I'd want to celebrate it differently. Not... more one than the other, just different.
[ he hopes that makes sense. he hopes that's not a bad, selfish thing to want. ]
And I don't know if we'll be at the same place at the same time, you know? Maybe we'll want to get married later, maybe Joon will want to wait, or Kwang...
[ he shrugs, because those are possibilities, and not upsetting ones. ]
But if they want it at the same time, if that works for them, I'd be happy with that too.
idk why there was a stray 'it' in my previous tag
[ After all, Hojoon and Kwang are very, very different people. It's not surprising that they'd want different things, even if they love the same person. ]
But you want to? Get married?
no subject
[ junsu runs his hand through his hair, bitting his lip. he'd never given it this much thought before, and he feels a bit... well, since it's such a new thought... ]
I mean, I want to be with them for the rest of my life, so. That's what it is, isn't it? Promising that?
no subject
[ It's just as much this kind of promise than it is promising to love and cherish him forever. ]
I want to give him all the things he's never had. A real life.
[ He looks at Junsu again, smiling. ]
But hey, you'd get to have two weddings, that's pretty neat.