[ he protests with a weak hey, but lets minsu steal a bite. he shoves the rest of it in his mouth.
and promptly wishes he hadn't, because that answer makes him... sad. he adds it to the things he wishes he'd done on time. he'd been so close to asking him on a date. ]
I almost — I almost asked you on one, once. [ he says, caught up in thinking back on how he'd texted him intending to ask. catching himself, he shakes his head. ]
I don't know why no one's asked you yet! You need to make Sage take you out.
[minsu's surprised, mouth hanging open until he realizes that there's a half-chewed twizzler in there. he closes it before swallowing.]
I didn't know.
[which makes sense, given that junsu didn't ask. what minsu really means is that he didn't know that's something junsu would ever have wanted to do with him. now he wants to ask him when, what they would've done on their date. but it makes him sad too, this memory that never got made, even if they can make new ones in its place.
[ junsu says softly, but his heart is racing a little. he's scared, suddenly, that minsu will think about this or what it means, or ask him questions he can't answer.
or say something wonderful and devastating, like how he would have said yes. he doesn't want to hear anything like that, because he's been living this like it wouldn't have happened no matter what, that minsu never had romantic feelings for him. he needs that to stay true.
he pats minsu's cheek. ]
When Sage comes back, he better take you on one. Or I'll have a word with him.
[he would've said yes. minsu wouldn't have had a reason in the world to say no, thinks he would've been happy and excited, and doesn't consider the butterfly effect of it.
what he wonders is why junsu didn't ask. what it was about minsu that made him hesitate. he wonders but he doesn't really want to know.]
The treehouse probably counts. [they go somewhere else together, it's romantic. isn't that what a date is? it doesn't really need the words "will you go out with me?", does it?] I just always imagine coffee shops and amusement parks. Movies and dinner.
[all the cliches that people who date a lot are probably bored of, but look different in the eyes of those who haven't.]
[ he's not sure the treehouse counts. it sounds like minsu wants something more typical, and that sounds fine to him. they sound like things minsu shouldn't even have to ask for. he gets that he might have to, though. the world has changed, and it's changed people, and people are scared and things like date have become a little less important in the grand scheme of things. ]
Yeah. Those are good dates.
[ he puts a hand on minsu's leg, reassuring. ]
The treehouse is one thing. If that's what you want, you should ask for it.
[he knows junsu is right. sage is a witch, not a mind reader. and minsu's gotten better at communicating what he wants, which is something that his boyfriend has also told him to do, over and over again.
he wraps his arms around junsu like he's a teddy bear, cheek against his shoulder.]
I guess I'd just like to be asked. Which is stupid.
[ junsu swallows. it's so not stupid. it's the opposite of stupid. it's sweet and cute and junsu wants to give him that, really badly. he puts his arms around minsu too, holding him back, staying close. ]
It's not stupid, honey.
[ he doesn't even understand why minsu isn't being asked on a date several times a day. it makes no sense to him, even prior to him being only with sage. ]
[minsu shakes his head against his shoulder before sighing heavily.]
When you're just...putting yourself out there for one thing, people don't even consider anything else. I probably chased away dozens of people who would've asked me, because they weren't looking for something quick and easy.
[a pause.]
Well maybe not dozens, that sounds a little conceited.
[ junsu shakes his head, laughing softly, but it's not really funny. minsu's just being sweet. and humble. ]
I'd believe it.
[ he turns his head, kissing the top of minsu's. he smells so good. probably junsu's favorite smell. there's nothing foreign or magical about it. it's just human. just minsu.
he shouldn't do this. it hurts, and it's going to hurt. but his love for minsu, his desire to see him happy, to make him smile and laugh, that overpowers everything. ]
[a few seconds pass between junsu saying the words and minsu lifting his head from his shoulder to look at him. he blinks a couple of times, letting that sink in.]
Can we do that?
[well, why couldn't they? it has the word 'friend' right there. minsu brightens, eyes growing wider and brighter, smiling appearing where there was no smile before. it's so easy to imagine this same reaction if junsu had asked him before.]
Oh...oh! Where should we go? Do we decide together or should I leave it up to you? I mean, yes, I'd love to!
[ it's way too easy to imagine the same reaction. junsu kind of figured this would hurt but he's not really ready. good enough at lying, at pretending, to hide anything that might show on his face. he tucks it away for later, when he's alone.
he wants to be excited about this instead, he wants to make this so, so good for minsu. ]
Yeah? I'd love that too. [ he smiles, touching minsu's cheek, fixing a strand of his hair before dropping his hand. ]
We can do this however you'd like. We can pick together. Or I can decide and surprise you.
Ah...I'm not sure. I never really gave it much thought.
[minsu mumbles before settling at junus's side again, lifting the tips of his fingers to his mouth without actually biting his fingernails. everything the fantasy started, minsu would stop thinking about it, protecting himself.]
Actually, I've thought about it a lot. If it's not too much pressure, please surprise me!
[ junsu's smiling. he can tell this means a lot to minsu. he's not even thinking of what it means, that he's asking him to do something like this before sage takes him to do it, because he just wants to see minsu happy.
and he thinks he knows the kind of things they could do together that would make it memorable. ]
Okay. [ he takes minsu's hand and squeezes it. ] I got you, honey. Don't worry about anything, I'll take care of it. If you have any special requests, though, let me know. I'll add them in.
[oh. yeah, this is the feeling he always imagined. the happiness and the excitement. feeling special, someone's choice, with all of those things lasting for days until the day, and leaving a sweet memory in its place after it's over.
nothing about it being a friend date diminishes that. this is something special with someone special. isn't that what really makes a date a date?
minsu pulls their hands to rest on his stomach, not wanting to let go.]
Maybe...just one. [sheepish. junsu is already giving him so much.] Can you let me know what you're going to wear the day before?
[ he's happy. minsu looks and sounds happy and it's such a simple thing. going to hang out together, but outside, going somewhere. that's what makes it different. ]
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and promptly wishes he hadn't, because that answer makes him... sad. he adds it to the things he wishes he'd done on time. he'd been so close to asking him on a date. ]
I almost — I almost asked you on one, once. [ he says, caught up in thinking back on how he'd texted him intending to ask. catching himself, he shakes his head. ]
I don't know why no one's asked you yet! You need to make Sage take you out.
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[minsu's surprised, mouth hanging open until he realizes that there's a half-chewed twizzler in there. he closes it before swallowing.]
I didn't know.
[which makes sense, given that junsu didn't ask. what minsu really means is that he didn't know that's something junsu would ever have wanted to do with him. now he wants to ask him when, what they would've done on their date. but it makes him sad too, this memory that never got made, even if they can make new ones in its place.
it's fine. even if his lips have formed a pout.]
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[ junsu says softly, but his heart is racing a little. he's scared, suddenly, that minsu will think about this or what it means, or ask him questions he can't answer.
or say something wonderful and devastating, like how he would have said yes. he doesn't want to hear anything like that, because he's been living this like it wouldn't have happened no matter what, that minsu never had romantic feelings for him. he needs that to stay true.
he pats minsu's cheek. ]
When Sage comes back, he better take you on one. Or I'll have a word with him.
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what he wonders is why junsu didn't ask. what it was about minsu that made him hesitate. he wonders but he doesn't really want to know.]
The treehouse probably counts. [they go somewhere else together, it's romantic. isn't that what a date is? it doesn't really need the words "will you go out with me?", does it?] I just always imagine coffee shops and amusement parks. Movies and dinner.
[all the cliches that people who date a lot are probably bored of, but look different in the eyes of those who haven't.]
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Yeah. Those are good dates.
[ he puts a hand on minsu's leg, reassuring. ]
The treehouse is one thing. If that's what you want, you should ask for it.
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[he knows junsu is right. sage is a witch, not a mind reader. and minsu's gotten better at communicating what he wants, which is something that his boyfriend has also told him to do, over and over again.
he wraps his arms around junsu like he's a teddy bear, cheek against his shoulder.]
I guess I'd just like to be asked. Which is stupid.
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It's not stupid, honey.
[ he doesn't even understand why minsu isn't being asked on a date several times a day. it makes no sense to him, even prior to him being only with sage. ]
Has no one ever asked you?
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[minsu shakes his head against his shoulder before sighing heavily.]
When you're just...putting yourself out there for one thing, people don't even consider anything else. I probably chased away dozens of people who would've asked me, because they weren't looking for something quick and easy.
[a pause.]
Well maybe not dozens, that sounds a little conceited.
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I'd believe it.
[ he turns his head, kissing the top of minsu's. he smells so good. probably junsu's favorite smell. there's nothing foreign or magical about it. it's just human. just minsu.
he shouldn't do this. it hurts, and it's going to hurt. but his love for minsu, his desire to see him happy, to make him smile and laugh, that overpowers everything. ]
Hey, Minsu. Want to go on a friend date with me?
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Can we do that?
[well, why couldn't they? it has the word 'friend' right there. minsu brightens, eyes growing wider and brighter, smiling appearing where there was no smile before. it's so easy to imagine this same reaction if junsu had asked him before.]
Oh...oh! Where should we go? Do we decide together or should I leave it up to you? I mean, yes, I'd love to!
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he wants to be excited about this instead, he wants to make this so, so good for minsu. ]
Yeah? I'd love that too. [ he smiles, touching minsu's cheek, fixing a strand of his hair before dropping his hand. ]
We can do this however you'd like. We can pick together. Or I can decide and surprise you.
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[minsu mumbles before settling at junus's side again, lifting the tips of his fingers to his mouth without actually biting his fingernails. everything the fantasy started, minsu would stop thinking about it, protecting himself.]
Actually, I've thought about it a lot. If it's not too much pressure, please surprise me!
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and he thinks he knows the kind of things they could do together that would make it memorable. ]
Okay. [ he takes minsu's hand and squeezes it. ] I got you, honey. Don't worry about anything, I'll take care of it. If you have any special requests, though, let me know. I'll add them in.
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nothing about it being a friend date diminishes that. this is something special with someone special. isn't that what really makes a date a date?
minsu pulls their hands to rest on his stomach, not wanting to let go.]
Maybe...just one. [sheepish. junsu is already giving him so much.] Can you let me know what you're going to wear the day before?
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Okay, babe.
[ he giggles softly, already thinking about outfits, about what they might do. what minsu might like as a friend date. ]
I'll text you a picture of my outfit, how about that?
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[there's a smile in minsu's voice as he rests his head against junsu's. it's like they're connected everywhere that they touch.
matching outfits though. does anyone have a cuter best friend than minsu? he doesn't think so.]
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[ he's happy. minsu looks and sounds happy and it's such a simple thing. going to hang out together, but outside, going somewhere. that's what makes it different. ]
It's going to be perfect, I promise.